Married to strangers, Filipinas endure isolation in South Korea
MANILA, Philippines - When Jennifer, a 38-year-old nurse from the Philippines, decided to marry a virtual stranger from Busan City in South Korea, she never expected that the union could lead to isolation.
It wasn’t that Busan is 328 kilometers from Seoul or that Korea’s capital is 2,613 kilometers from Manila. The isolation that Jennifer felt was not about distance but more about culture.
She did not take delight in eating pungent kimchi. She never really knew how to speak Korean. So it was hard to love her husband without verbal intimacy. Worse, she did not feel that her in-laws loved her well enough, much less did she feel accepted by the community.
Jennifer’s struggle is also experienced by other Filipinas and Asian women from developing countries who marry Korean men, according to migrant advocacy group Kanlungan Center Foundation Inc.
And yet the number of foreign wives in Korea is increasing. Koreans who used to be proud of keeping their bloodlines pure by not marrying foreigners are now in a hurry scouring for wives from the Philippines, China, and Vietnam.
Data from the US Department of Defense show that interracial marriages in Korea started to triple between 2001 and 2006. Quoting reports from the Korean Statistics Office, the department said one in eight Koreans had married foreigners. In rural areas, the figure rose past 30 percent.
From 1990 to 2006, 6,216 Filipino women tied the knot with Koreans, or one marriage every day, according to the same office.
Kanlungan says that today, one in 10 marriages in Korea, the third largest country in Asia, is between a native and a foreigner. Of these, 70 percent is between Korean men and women from other Asian countries.
The trend of rural Korean men seeking brides from poor Asian nations is expected to continue. By 2012, it is estimated that for every 100 women there will be 124 men in Korea aged 24 to 30.
Not love
The motivation for marrying foreigners among Korean men is not necessarily anchored on love or deep emotional commitment.
According to the Action Research on Marriage Migration Network (ARMMNet), interracial marriages in Korea are often consensual, but many unions "have not grown from genuine emotional investment and sustained by equal roles of partners."
If it’s not love, then what prods Korean men to chase women from poorer Asian countries?
Experts are one in saying that the economic boom in Korea, which has the 13th largest gross domestic product in the world, has played a major role in the change of marriage patterns in the country.
They say the boom has empowered Korean women, making them more educated and financially secure. They have left the countryside, moved to cities, and decided to either not marry or delay marriage until Mr. Right shows up.
This has resulted in the decreasing number of Korean women who no longer want to play the role of traditional housewives and the increasing number of bachelors in rural Korea, mostly farmers and fishermen who long for domesticated spouses.
Wanted: Submissive wives
A study by Mika Toyota, a research fellow at the National University of Singapore’s Asian Research Institute, shows that Korean men, especially those in the countryside, have been active in seeking traditional wives from poorer countries – those who can stay home, take care of kids, and do household chores.
According to Gavin Jones, another sociologist at the same institute, Korean men are looking for "submissive women," who they can no longer find in their own country.
Another study by Hye Kyung-Lee of South Korea’s Pan Chai University echoes Toyota and Jones’ findings.
He says Korean men prefer Filipina and Vietnamese brides because of their subservience. "Lower class" Korean men look for "more submissive, obedient, and traditional (foreign) wives to serve them and take care of their parents," says Hye.
In many cases, the interracial unions result in problems among virtual strangers in a supposedly intimate relationship.
“Most brides expect a better life in Korea but they realize they have been conned as soon as they arrive. Many marriage migrants suffer from domestic violence or economic problems, severe intervention by in-laws or their husbands’ incapability," says Kim Na Hyun, a Vietnamese marriage migrant and a member of ARMMNet.
But the issue of interracial marriage, which victimizes Asian women in poor countries, is often being sidestepped, according to ARMMNet members.
"Despite its significant social and cultural impact, marriage migration has not been included in mainstream migration agenda, (and are) merely (being) explained as sex trafficking, mail order bride, or female migrant labor issues," members of the network say.
For Tesa de Vela, associate director of Isis International, the problem can be addressed if governments start taking the lead in ensuring that the rights and welfare of these women are protected, while nongovernment organizations "look into ways of supporting women wherever they may be."
Maureen Pagaduan, research fellow of the Asian Regional Exchange on New Alternatives, agrees, adding that states with marriage migrants should start recognizing home and family as "sites" where "democratic practice" should be promoted. - A.R. Sabangan, with reports from Kim Tan, GMANews.TV
It wasn’t that Busan is 328 kilometers from Seoul or that Korea’s capital is 2,613 kilometers from Manila. The isolation that Jennifer felt was not about distance but more about culture.
She did not take delight in eating pungent kimchi. She never really knew how to speak Korean. So it was hard to love her husband without verbal intimacy. Worse, she did not feel that her in-laws loved her well enough, much less did she feel accepted by the community.
Jennifer’s struggle is also experienced by other Filipinas and Asian women from developing countries who marry Korean men, according to migrant advocacy group Kanlungan Center Foundation Inc.
And yet the number of foreign wives in Korea is increasing. Koreans who used to be proud of keeping their bloodlines pure by not marrying foreigners are now in a hurry scouring for wives from the Philippines, China, and Vietnam.
Data from the US Department of Defense show that interracial marriages in Korea started to triple between 2001 and 2006. Quoting reports from the Korean Statistics Office, the department said one in eight Koreans had married foreigners. In rural areas, the figure rose past 30 percent.
From 1990 to 2006, 6,216 Filipino women tied the knot with Koreans, or one marriage every day, according to the same office.
Kanlungan says that today, one in 10 marriages in Korea, the third largest country in Asia, is between a native and a foreigner. Of these, 70 percent is between Korean men and women from other Asian countries.
The trend of rural Korean men seeking brides from poor Asian nations is expected to continue. By 2012, it is estimated that for every 100 women there will be 124 men in Korea aged 24 to 30.
Not love
The motivation for marrying foreigners among Korean men is not necessarily anchored on love or deep emotional commitment.
According to the Action Research on Marriage Migration Network (ARMMNet), interracial marriages in Korea are often consensual, but many unions "have not grown from genuine emotional investment and sustained by equal roles of partners."
If it’s not love, then what prods Korean men to chase women from poorer Asian countries?
Experts are one in saying that the economic boom in Korea, which has the 13th largest gross domestic product in the world, has played a major role in the change of marriage patterns in the country.
They say the boom has empowered Korean women, making them more educated and financially secure. They have left the countryside, moved to cities, and decided to either not marry or delay marriage until Mr. Right shows up.
This has resulted in the decreasing number of Korean women who no longer want to play the role of traditional housewives and the increasing number of bachelors in rural Korea, mostly farmers and fishermen who long for domesticated spouses.
Wanted: Submissive wives
A study by Mika Toyota, a research fellow at the National University of Singapore’s Asian Research Institute, shows that Korean men, especially those in the countryside, have been active in seeking traditional wives from poorer countries – those who can stay home, take care of kids, and do household chores.
According to Gavin Jones, another sociologist at the same institute, Korean men are looking for "submissive women," who they can no longer find in their own country.
Another study by Hye Kyung-Lee of South Korea’s Pan Chai University echoes Toyota and Jones’ findings.
He says Korean men prefer Filipina and Vietnamese brides because of their subservience. "Lower class" Korean men look for "more submissive, obedient, and traditional (foreign) wives to serve them and take care of their parents," says Hye.
In many cases, the interracial unions result in problems among virtual strangers in a supposedly intimate relationship.
“Most brides expect a better life in Korea but they realize they have been conned as soon as they arrive. Many marriage migrants suffer from domestic violence or economic problems, severe intervention by in-laws or their husbands’ incapability," says Kim Na Hyun, a Vietnamese marriage migrant and a member of ARMMNet.
But the issue of interracial marriage, which victimizes Asian women in poor countries, is often being sidestepped, according to ARMMNet members.
"Despite its significant social and cultural impact, marriage migration has not been included in mainstream migration agenda, (and are) merely (being) explained as sex trafficking, mail order bride, or female migrant labor issues," members of the network say.
For Tesa de Vela, associate director of Isis International, the problem can be addressed if governments start taking the lead in ensuring that the rights and welfare of these women are protected, while nongovernment organizations "look into ways of supporting women wherever they may be."
Maureen Pagaduan, research fellow of the Asian Regional Exchange on New Alternatives, agrees, adding that states with marriage migrants should start recognizing home and family as "sites" where "democratic practice" should be promoted. - A.R. Sabangan, with reports from Kim Tan, GMANews.TV
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